Child Development

I’ve never trusted FSBO’s. They didn’t appear reliable enough. Anyone
is able to post anything there. How could I trust my home ($600k
worth) to those amateurs? I believe their only function that works
well enough is money transfer.
Fizber has changed my mind, really. I’ve got what FSBO is and what FSBO should be while surfing their site. You know, all those modern things are the clue. You have no need to make all those weary visits to know the house well. Just use the webcam. You can see it in a satellite view in Google Maps embedded. You can evaluate your neighborhood. You can contact every appraiser, realtor or mortgage agent just from your laptop.
FSBO looks comfortable with Fizber.

Right at the end of XIX century in the city of Milford, that in American state Nebraska, in modest Millz family the boy was born. He has received a proud name Victor from his parents. The childhood of our hero is noted by a little essential achievements.
Further there was a military service on the American fleet, concurrent on time with the first world war, then  he worked as a welder. He studied at George Washington’s university at chemical technology.
From the moment of the ending of study (1926) and before retire (1961) Millz was working at  Procter and Gamble company, showing miracles of an ingenuity in a post of the leading chemist-technologist.
Nevertheless his life did not consist at all of one work. The daughter was born, and after some decades Millz became the grandfather. As there was not one grandson, Millz had to help her daughter in his free time. We can imagine the thoughts of a grandfather who had to pull out wet diapers from his own grandsons, wash and dry them.
Millz has created an idea that it was possible not to wash them. It was  necessary to throw out! And on this idea of the great chemist we shall for a short while stop our attention. The idea of a disposable diaper was born not because grandfather Victor wished to improve a life of the grandsons. The essence of  Millz invention has been dictated by man’s egoism, elementary aspiration to facilitate a life to himself.
So, house torments of Millz have led him to mobilize several employees that the idea has received a practical embodiment.
The primary goal was a creation of a folded lining with high absorbing ability. And this lining was planned to place in plastic cowards of the special form.
First models  Millz has tested on his own grandsons. In general he tested everything on his family. His wife and daughter perfectly remembered that time when everybody was cleaning their teeth with a tooth-powder, and they did it by a liquid tooth-paste that was thought up by Millz.
Home tests have confirmed a perspectivity of idea, so then it was necessary  to create an experimental batch and to look how the American population would react to a new product.
The population has reacted extremely negatively and the idea of disposable diapers was  nearly to die.
It was difficult to think up conditions for tests more adverse. Disposable diapers have tried to use in the summer in the city of Dallas when the temperature did not fall below 90F. It is rather easy to imagine now the reaction of parents who, in the described weather conditions, have been proposed, to dress on the child plastic cowards. And few agreed daredevils very quickly stopped experiments with babies as the irritation of a skin arose almost instantly.
But as it is known bad result is also a result. Fortunately, developers didn’t feel utterly discouraged. As a result, March, 1959 became date in the history of the mankind which has marked first successful mass use of disposable diapers.
The experimental batch has been prepared for this time from 37 thousand diapers. Founders have refused the dense plastic that nearly has not ruined good undertaking, the product became softer, the lining absorbed a moisture is better, moreover it was offered at once two variants  on buttons and on stickums. The city of Rochester of state of New York was the place for experiments. Two thirds of the families, that participated in experiment, have admitted that fact, that new disposable diapers, for certain, are not worse old and habitual reusable. They liked the model with buttons more.
There were two tasks : first, to think up of the product name and and the second thing was to create the equipment for mass production of disposable diapers.
With the first task not without difficulties of course, but coped quickly enough. Having touched set of variants, a diaper was named “Pampers” using as a basis an English word “pamper”, that means “to indulge”. Some people like other variants of translation more - “to cherish, “coddle”, but it does not change an essence of business. 
The second task was much serious. Some technologists even assure, that, at least, in long-term history  of Procter and Gamble there was nothing more difficult than that. At first sight all is elementary: there are three layers which should be stuck together. But when from a lining the heap of a dust is formed, and this dust incorporates to glue and scatters in all the sides any equipment very quickly stops to be the equipment. Nevertheless, the technology of product could finally be improved, and pampers  began the victorious procession all over the world. Firstly it (procession) was not so such impetuous, and the main brake of this promotion was the price of a product. Pampers liked parents, but, in view of the price in 10 cents for a unit, economical Americans were ready to continue washing.
And only after the volume of production grew in some times, the price has satisfied all - both buyers and manufacturers. The ripened revolutionary situation has predetermined a full and unconditional victory of disposable diapers over greater pleasure of all progressive mankind.

TV is the powerful mass media involving both adults and children. It is also a favourite kind for children for spending their free time watching TV. Thus it is necessary to consider, that each fourth child from eight till twelve years has his/her own TV. As a whole advertising (children’s and adult together) makes 10 % of all screen time.
It seems, anybody does not doubt any more that the modern industry of advertising actively maintains children.

Last researches show, that children define about half of all family purchases that makes more than 90 billion euro a year at a level of the country.

Researches of social psychologists have shown, that children till 8 years
-      do not always distinguish television advertising from other transfers and are not capable to distinguish its convincing purpose;
- illegibly enough trust TV advertising;
- wish to get the advertised goods and finger in this occasion of parents; while growing the child looks through 350 000 rollers
Many advertisement makers think that it is not useful to try to catch a recognition of people with already settled sights and persuade them to buy products . It is much more favourable to involve in itself the young audience easily perceiving all new, with not settled tastes, habits, with even not generated style and a way of life. The generation, since young years brought up in spirit of adherence to the certain brand, will keep the attachment during all life.
Thus, the modern child who has not issued yet as the person, not always still able to distinguish bad from good, harmful from useful, already knows, than it is possible to satisfy the thirst, what beer correct where to find guarantees and what to do, if there is no tooth-brush…

Not the secret, that the majority of adult televiewers does not like to look advertising rollers.
And small children practically do not have feeling of irritation because of the same advertising clips which repeat infinitely. The same teleroller they are ready to look repeatedly and with indefatigable interest. Kids from 4 till 6 years, and not so solvent adults continue to watch TV during translation of advertising blocks.

Psychologists consider that, ”small children are involved first of all with movement on the screen and a bright picture, instead of sense of the advertising message. The stream of the semantic information is perceived by them unconsciously. It is based on physiological feature of recognition: the attention of the person is focused on changes in surrounding space, instead of that is constant. Without additional strong-willed effort the person cannot long concentrate on stationary object. The weariness and attention collects is switched spontaneously. And on the contrary, the more changes, the stronger attention to them.
Modern advertising is characterized by dynamism. The child completely falls under authority of advertising. In advertising clips visual images vary so quickly, that the attention of the child simply has not time to get tired and obediently follows them.
Always remember that the unique purpose of any advertising - to force you to buy something. According to this purpose also perceive all “creative” attempts, even if they deliberately noncommercial as in such kind they can be especially dangerous. If to follow even only to this piece of advice half of television advertising will not cause in you anything, except for bewilderment.
There is a lot of debates about the impact of advertising on children’s mind.  There are people who think that there is some useful information for children in any advertisement that helps their developing mind. Some advertisements are funny and as everybody knows laugh prolongs our life.  Children get used to such notions as price, money, work. But I agree with people who think that advertising mostly brings harm for children who take the first steps in their life.

The birth of a child is an important event at all points, including a psychological aspect. As a rule, all members of a family are looking forward to the birth of a child. But it also happens that there is some kind of anxiety as we worry about the future of our child. The attitude to a child should be found in personality of his/her parents, in their experience and impressions of their own life. One of the most efficient source is the impression of a childhood and experience in relationships with their own parents. If our childhood was happy and we always were surrounded by people who loved and took care of us, then it is obviously that during all our life we will have a belief that to be a child is wonderful.  No wonder, that people with good light childhood, when they become adults, more often are eager to have their own children and always wish them to have a similar pilgrimage without the mistakes that have already been done by their parents. Young parents usually follow the same principles in upbringing of their children as they sometime experienced themselves. From my point of view it is not right in some way, cause we raise a new person who cannot be the same as we are. Of course we obtain some experience while we bring up our child, while different relations with other parents. We also can obtain some experience from TV-programs. We also should take into account an experience in relations with friends and relatives, an experience of our wife or husband. If young people experience satisfaction in their intimate feelings, if their love has a supraliminal direction, then we can say for sure that very soon they would like to see continuation of their happiness in a child. About the thing what a child means to young parents we can judge if we take an example of a couple that does not have its own children and who take a child from a children’s home for example. There we can see a willingness to have someone, whom we can give our love and care, who will be the affirmation of a simple fact that the highest destination of a family consists in the continuation of mankind. A baby, who is unable to survive in the world without his/her parents, homuncular defenceless child just because of his/her nakedness allows two beloved people to outlast a joy of revelation , satisfaction and tremor, anxiety and care that are generated by a flourishing life of a child. This very child gives the parents the possibility to outlast amazing feelings that we cannot compare with anything else, enriches the internal world of the parents in some way and also gives some kind of life experience that can be obtained only in joint life of the parents and their children. With the appearance of a child, a family unit develops and becomes stronger and with the growth of a child the parents also progress and acquire inimitable life wisdom that is peculiar only to a human being.

Every woman does not be pregnant alone if she lives with intimate person. Usually both partners are pregnant. But what does it mean? It is not a secret, that people who live together have the same thoughts and opinions; they bear resemblance to each other. Even have the same symptoms of sickness. Men take hard pregnancy practically as women. There is a good people’s saying: “We are pregnant” or “We wait a child”
The situation of pregnancy for a man, who lives near, is more extreme than for a woman. She simply meets her engagements. Every woman knows that it is her mission to become a mom. And motherhood is the main purpose in the life. The same situation we can see in the nature. Males are a match for females, chase about them very carefully. Females choose prepotent and the most healthy male with thinks to have the most healthy and valuable descendants. Then, when the female has chosen, everybody wants to reproduce. Decree of nature! And after the female has become pregnant, she does not allow coming near the male. She has reached her goal. The next period is child-bearing. In the nature the male is only means, and the goal is posterity.
In the life people have another variety of means and goals, which are more global than animals have. But motherhood still remains unconscious instinct of every woman. That is why in spite of hard child-bearing and delivery, women want to have their own children. But about what does think every man, when he has heard this news? News about approaching fatherhood for man, especially young, ambition and energetic, firstly cause a real shock. He does not fell happy. He does not think about his contribution to the history. He does not think that someone will have his surname and will continue his family. I’m sorry, but the majority of the men think that they lost their sweet liberty and unconcerned adolescence. But not all of course! Some think like this: “How did it happen? I’m not ready…”
As for women, all their thoughts direct to upcoming baby. People say that expectant mother is more laid-back. She has unusual enigmatic look, softness and defenselessness. The man feels alarm, panic and fear of the unknown. His happiness comes much later. Men become responsible for the child. They have to protect their woman from the difficulties of the rest of the world. Pregnancy causes radical changes in the life of the both, in their relations, attitude to the life. It is a real strength test. It is a limitation of needs, responsibility for future, rebuilding of the plans and reconsideration of life values. It is a critical situation, only without critical days.
The conduct of future father depends on a lot of factors. Firstly, on his internal and individual features, upbringing, relations with his parents, attitude to the wife, maturity as an individual, readiness to realize emergent difficulties and new responsibility and desire to show his worth in a new role: defender, supporter,  bread-winner and educator. It is very difficult for a man to be in the mood for experiences of his wife. From very beginning a woman contacts with her future baby. Pregnancy gives a wonderful chance to receive a lot of new feelings. It gives a feel of unity, divine pacification. Some men are delighted with woman’s capacity for giving a birth to a new person. The others perceive it easy, as physiological peculiarity. This feature from one side causes a feeling of women’s power and from another a feeling of men’s imperfection. This state of affairs provokes a man to compensate such situation. And as a result they work a lot, find a new woman or spend all their free time with friends.
In the beginning a man faces only with losses (from his point of view!) – less care of his wife, loss of his liberty, social and  everyday problems, uncertainty and alarm for his future life. Sometimes a man feels that the baby takes his place, that the woman becomes all-sufficient and does not need him. Fear to become useless is the most serious emotional experience of every man.
Expectant woman can evoke in the man an image of his mother. And his reaction to the pregnancy will depend on a lot of his relations with the mom. Men like a big children!
Pregnancy is a real chance to strengthen a family. Both partners can not be free, because their future baby binds them as invisible thread. Sometimes men try to come back to their past life, time when they were really free. And as a result they can have affair with another woman. It looks like as psychological relaxation from new problems and future concerns. Some men are bored with their expectant wives, because women speak only about the baby and problems with their health. They are not so interesting interlocutors as it was before. And as a result men find passions and hobbies.
It is very difficult for man to understand what happens in the organism of his expectant wife. He can not have the same feelings according to his biological nature. But nowadays the scientists states that there are expectant man. Some men try to be imbued with pregnancy of their wives. The level of hormones in blood of this men increases. But this does not damage them. On the contrary, these men become the most careful and attentive fathers. After the delivery the level of hormones in blood rehabilitates itself. Such men for nine months are psychologically ready to the birth of the baby. And the baby before the birth has a positive image of his father. This active conduct of the man brings together both partners and influences positive to the process of pregnancy, emotional state of the woman and valuable intellectual development of the baby in future.

The first disposable pampers appeared in the USA in 1961. In the early seventies they quickly evolve, as all manufactures learn more about the main requirements of their customers. All sizes of pampers, comfortable clasps appeared in this every year. Absorbent characteristics become more and more better.
Nowadays, every mother does not refuse disposable pampers, because they have a lot of advantages over gauze pampers. Convenience and easiness in using, saving of efforts and time, and the main – dryness, comfort and appreciable benefit for the baby – are the main advantages of disposable pampers.
With the advent of disposable pampers all mothers throughout the world do not need to launder swaddling clothes as they did some years ago. And now they can find more time for their children. Walks in fresh wind became longer and easier, because all mothers do not wait that their baby can piss and they have to go home immediately in order to change his clothes. It is very convenient, because in case of walk, which is too far from the house, mothers have not to return home with crying baby. Also pampers kindly influence both the dream of the baby and his parents. Mothers have not to be up late at night in order to change clothes of crying baby.
 But every good invention will be useless if a person uses it wrongly. So, parents should not constantly pack up the baby in disposable pampers. When they change pampers they must leave their baby naked in order to his skin can breathe. The doctors do not recommend to leave the baby in the same disposable pampers more than six hours, it is necessary to change it every four hour and, of course, more better to change it every time the baby pissed. If the baby does not sleep his parents can take off pampers and let him take air-bath.
Now I would like to draw your attention that, firstly, you should not name all diapers “pampers” as Pampers is a trade mark of child’s disposable diapers of the company the Procter & Gamble. Moony, Goon, Huggies, Pampers, Libero and the other are child’s disposable diapers and it is wrong to name them pampers.
Secondly, in order to choose the right mark of disposable diapers for your baby, you should know some specific features. So, disposable diapers function the next way:  liquid passes through the integumentary layer very quickly, the adsorbent takes up this liquid and keeps it from contact with the skin of the baby. It is really very important to minimize this contact in order to prevent irritation and keep the skin of the baby healthy. Disposable diapers basically consist of paper. Absorbing material is a medley of cellulose and super absorbent, which change in gel during the contact with the liquid. In that way, a diaper absorbs the excess of liquid and keeps the skin dry. But there are such diapers that only consist of cellulose. This type of diapers is worse, because absorb the liquid less than the first ones. And in this case there is a risk of irritation.
Modern diapers have special clasps that help to keep a nappy on the baby. A lot of diapers have flexible cuffs round the lags and flexible belt.
Recently the Japanese have invented so called “breath” nappies “Moony”. Their external layer has microscopical holes that help the entrance of air. Their internal layer consists of gauzy stripes with special aloe balsam, which creates a thin, but reliable protective barrier and helps to avoid irritation. They have good design, beautiful clasps and absorb the liquid extremely well.
Now you know a lot about disposable diapers. And it will be easier for you to choose the right ones.
However, a lot of moms throughout the world try to avoid the using of diapers. The reason is obvious. It is disagreements between the doctors. Ones believe that disposable diapers are very useful, because they protect the skin of the baby and help to save time of their moms. But the others think that they are enough dangerous because can lead to boy’s sterility. But who are right?
First of all I would like to say that the skin of the baby is not as perfect as adults have. In ideal it functions as double-sided barrier: inside it should keep moisture and albumen, but outside protects from mechanical and bacterial influences. It a scientific fact, that our skin keeps about 17 per cent of all moisture. But thin and delicate layer is not reliable, and it can not protect the organism from physical influences completely. The formation of coverlet ends to 2-3 year.
When irritants influence the skin of the baby, inflammatory process appears
in the places of contact between swaddling bands and the skin. The doctors name this inflammation as dermatitis. The first mention of this sickness appeared in 117 B.C. At that time people bathed their children in medley of wine, urine and salt solution in order to get rid of this illness. From this time all doctors throughout the world rack their brains over the fact how to overcome this sore. But in the eighties they understood the main reason of this disaster. This sickness begins because of lingering contact between urine and the skin. As a result the moisture increases and it leads to the rise of friction. So the skin becomes weak and can not protect from harmful substances.
After a lot of discussions about harm of diapers, the institution of baby health made a scientific investigation. This search proved that internal microclimate of diapers was highly favourable for the skin of the baby. This institution fixed fewer cases of dermatitis and reddenings. The average temperature did not change inside the “cocoon” in comparison with tissue diapers. That is why the talks of some urologists about high temperature inside the diapers and as a result boy’s sterility are unjustified. My congratulations!

The statistics is too sad: for example, in Russia every third woman decides to have an abortion. Almost 10 per cent of women of childbearing age have an abortion once a year, at that 60 per cent of women break off their first pregnancy. It is an obvious fact that abortion is the most popular method of contraception. What are the origins of this national phenomenon? In order to answer this question I would like to turn to the history.
In Ancient Greece and Rome law did not defend the life of fetus. The government did not punish the artificial fetus wastage. It was punished only in the case of selfish ends or other low motives. At that time people used the special preparation of ergot – plant, which stimulated spastic clonus and dead of fetus. But this method did not always cause stillborn foetus and it had serious casual consequences. Later, when the Rome Empire needed more slavers and soldiers to conquer the territory of its neighbors, the government punished pronouncedly all women and men, who provoked abortion.
According to Christian dogma, the fetus from the moment of conception has his own soul, that is why his murder in belly is a very serious fault. Therefore, in the Middle Age abortion was considered as the heinous crime and was equal to the murder of relatives. In the sixteenth century under the influence of the church the majority of the European countries, such as England, France and Germany, punished abortion with the death penalty. In succeeding years it has been changed in hard labor and imprisonment. Punishment has involved both a doctor and his patient. The situation was the same until the beginning of the twentieth century. In England the government permitted abortion in the case of medical statements, and also in the case of rape.
All doctors say: “There are no good abortions”. All abortions classify in early (to twelve weeks of pregnancy) and late (from twelve to twenty eighth weeks). But in practice the doctors use abortion in the early period of pregnancy. There is such conception as mini-abortion (from twelve to twenty fifth days).
 There are a lot of methods of pregnancy breaking. Unsurgical methods of pregnancy breaking have much more advantages in comparison with traditional ones, because they practically do not cause the negative consequences. There are not mechanical traumas. There are not complications and difficulties, connected with anaesthesia. But there are of course some disadvantages, such as the presence of contra-indications and decrease of effectiveness. But if it is too late to have abortion, there is only one method. This is so called classic abortion. When women choose a hospital it is necessary that this hospital has a special license and doctor has a special certificate.
Sometimes there are some complications after abortion. For example, excreta containing some blood. Their quantity and the period depend on the term of pregnancy, blood coagulability.  There are two types of complications: early and late. Early ones take place during the abortion or after it. The late abortions appear after a while, sometimes many years after the operation. Generally speaking the complications are not the infrequent phenomenon.
The doctors mention High-risk group:
-women with two and more abortions;
-women who have sickness of privy parts;
-women who have operation of uterus before;
- women who broke off their first pregnancy with surgical method
Early complications:
The most terrible complication of abortion is change of wall of uterus. The most frequent complications are bleeding, damage of cervix of the uterus, damage of coagulability of blood. Besides, after abortion
become more acute chronic deceases of privy parts. So called infected abortion represents a great damage.
Late complications:
Here I can mention sickness of privy parts, hormone-containing damages, and barrenness. After abortion increase the frequency of abdominal pregnancies. After one abortion there is a threat of miscarriage and it consists of 26 per cent.  After two abortions it increases to 32 per cent and after three and more – 41 per cent.
Recommendations of gynecologists:
The choice of women that decided to have an abortion must include only methods without operations. Of course it will be cost more expensive, but we can not play with our health. Mini-abortion is the most appropriate type of chirurgical operations. It characterizes
the least frequency of casual effects. All chirurgical operations should include the antibiotics. As usual the doctors prescribe the antibiotics two days before the operation. It is desired to be observed by the doctor after abortion. In the case of chirurgical operations women can live their sexual life in 7-14 days, in another case (I mean instrumental operations) in a month. But, in general, all women and men should know that the main method of planning the family and decreasing the number of abortions is competent using of modern contraception.
          

Today I would like to draw your attention to culture differences and people attitude to the birth of baby in different countries. And I have chosen the most interesting countries from my point of view such as Muslim ones. So, what does happen in Muslim family and community after the birth of the baby? The birth of every new person the Moslems consider as a great gift of Allah, the most important event in the life of every Muslim family. There are specials conditions, which regulate the actions of parents and their relatives in connection with the birth of baby.
1. The first sigh and the first word. The first word that every Muslim baby hears is “God”. As soon as the baby born in his ears whisper the words of praising of the Most High: in the right – appeal to the prayer and to the left – the second appeal to the prayer.  As a rule the father does it. This ceremony has a deep sense.  According to Islam, Satan, the main enemy of all people, waits impatiently for the birth of every baby in order to lead astray. That is why it is very important that the baby hears the appeal to God before the call of Satan. The words of belief in God and faithfulness will accompany him during his life.
2. Sweetness of the first moments. After the baby has heard the divine words it is necessary to anoint his lips and oral cavity with date mass. The mother does it the next manner. Firstly she chews well a date, than takes a small part of it and puts in the mouth of the baby. Then she massages his oral cavity with light movements in order to place this mass throughout the oral cavity. In the same time she reads prayers to health and good wishes to her baby. If the parents have not a date, they can use every sweet fruit. People consider that this massage strengthens the muscles of baby. According to the legend the prophet Muhammad himself have done this procedure in the first time.
3. Hair worth weight in gold. In seven days after the birth of baby it is desired to shave his head and distribute among the poor silver and gold, the weight of which is equal to shaved hair. In another case the parents can give a sum of money corresponding the quantity of this precious metal. But what the parents should do, if the baby does not have hair at all? They should simply distribute charity among those, who need it.
4. The importance of the name. The choice of the name is very important for the Moslems. Bur there are some disagreements according to the target date. Some insist on calling the baby in the seventh day after his birth. The others persist in doing it in the first day. But the day is not so important. The attitude to this event in the life of every person is much more significant. The Moslems should call their children in the name of prophets and angels. It is reasonable that that the name of the first prophet Muhammad is the most popular. But there are other recommendations. A person, who is responsible for it, should observe on the name of the baby in order to save him from offensive mockeries. People say that even Prophet himself changed disharmonious names. The names of boys include not only the names of prophets and angels, but also ones, which have the root “abd”. Girls usually have the names of the women from the family of Prophet
5. Thank God. It is desired (if the parents of the baby have enough money) in the seventh day after his birth to sacrifice a sheep. If the girl has born, it is necessary to sacrifice one sheep in the case of the birth of boy it is necessary to slaughter one or two sheep. It depends on the financial position of his father. But nowadays in the cities it is not so easy to sacrifice an animal. But the Moslems try to resolve this problem. They go to suburb in order to do this ceremonial there. People, who are too far from Islam, may think that this custom is very exotic or even barbaric. But the Moslems believe that God doe not need this sacrifice. They think that people themselves need it.
6. Circumcision as a sign of submission to Allah. This custom is very ancient and not only people of Islam do it. The Moslems do it with their sons in order to show that the parents, completely submitted to Allah, pass the baby to his will. A person with a special medical and religion education can do the circumcision. He can do it both at home and in any hospital, where there is a surgeon. There is no a single opinion about the day of circumcision. The majority of doctors believe that it necessary to do the circumcision in the same day with the shaving of hair of the baby. It means in the seventh day after his birth. For example, in Turkey, doctors do it with the boys at the age of 7-10. However, all boys of the full legal age should be cut.
The possibility to have children is very important for all Moslems. They marry not only to satisfy their carnal needs. It is much more essential to born and to bring-up own children. The Moslems believe that children are the greatest plenty of God. That is why in Muslim families the wife and the husband are not slave and sovereign, their relations are build on mutual respect and care.

Today in a bus I heard a little talk between two young women about all advantages and disadvantages of their own baby-sitters. That is why I decided to know why mothers need a nanny and what every woman should do in order to find a good one.
The more time a mother spends with her baby, the better it is. It is necessary to wait as minimum one and a half year and only after that to think about the job. Three year is the best alternative.
A housemaid is much better than any baby-sitter. She not only exempts a woman from housekeeping, but she also will be able to walk with the baby when he is sleeping and will stay with the child if a mother needs to left him for several hours. However, when the child is staying awake, alongside with him should be his mom. If it is necessary for a woman to go to work, she must choose a baby-sitter at the age of 30-45. It will be ideal if she married and has her own children preschool and school age. It is really important because all children are very sensitive. If a baby-sitter has her own baby, she necessarily possesses emotional and practical experience in relations with children.
If a baby-sitter has not her own children or if a baby-sitter is a woman of pensionable age, who wants the grandchild, there is a high probability that this very woman will transfer outstanding mothering feelings to the baby. This baby-sitter will be attached to the child very much. And firstly this situation is too dangerous for the mom, because she may begin to be jealous. As a result, the atmosphere in the house will be negative and it will have an effect on baby badly.
A baby-sitter not under any circumstances should exceed her authority and replace the mom. The most dangerous are advertised super-nannies such as teachers and doctors. They can literally enslave the whole family. For example, a baby-sitter accustoms the baby to eat or to sleep only in her presence. After that it will be very easy for her to manipulate the mom. That is why every woman should watch closely in order to keep all positions in the family in the same place. May a child have so called ceremonials, which makes the mom, for example, a special song before dream.
It is very important that a baby-sitter has the same positions to the upbringing as parents have.
We suppose that you have chosen a baby-sitter. But let she spend about a week with the baby under the supervision. It is a good chance to understand suit this baby-sitter or not!
However, if you want to find a good and responsible person you should use the next question during the interview.
1. The first and the most important is “Tell me please about your experience.” It is very important that a baby-sitter worked with children at the age of your own baby. You should know in details how many children were in the charge of this woman. As two-week experience you hardly like. Try to know if this baby-sitter looks after for several children in the same time. The question about recommendation is both important and unimportant. Some parents prefer them, the others trust only themselves.
2. The second is “What did you do before?” This question is about profession. The main plus is experience in the child institutions and appropriate education such as pedagogical, psychological and medical. It will be very good if she has additional experience and skills. For instance, knack of massage, knowledge of languages, music and so on.
3. The third is “What situation is more serious, when baby is crying or when he is too active and energetic?” This question helps you to know the character of your future nanny as well as possible. If she chooses the first variant, it means that your nanny has not enough patience and she can easily get angry. In another case it means that she is not energetic herself and hardly she will encourage active games.
4. The forth is “Do you smoke?” I think this point is very important because healthy of the baby depends on it. If the nanny says yes, you should take obligation from her not to smoke when the baby stays close.
5. The fifth is “Describe, please, your daily routine, working with the baby.” Of course the future baby-sitter can embellish the reality, telling how they firstly sing songs and read fairy tales, and then go to park in order to work up an appetite. But in any case in her answers will be some nuances, which she will not be able to keep back. If the nanny simply lists daily affairs, which have their own time, there is a chance that she will be attentive to the internal development of the child.
6. The sixth question is “From your point of view, how looks the ideal baby?” This question helps to know how this baby-sitter can cope with difficult situations. If she wants the baby will be happy, it is a big plus. If she dreams about calm and accommodating baby, will be careful! Probably she afraid weeping and will yield in difficult situation.
7. The next question is provocative “The child has fainted away. Your actions?” Due to this question you can easily check the quickness of her reaction. If she does not know what to answer, think, suit this woman to you or not. If she answers that will call the ambulance or will connect with parents without delay – you are lucky, because you have found a really good nanny.
8. This questions concerns food which a baby–sitter prefers. Your baby needs balanced food. As in the most cases your nanny will cook it is really very important to know what she knows about dietetically food.
9. The ninth question is “How do you spend your holidays?” or “Do you have a lot of friends?” This question helps you to know your baby-sitter is homebody or soul of the party. Yes, of course, your baby needs active games, but sometimes he wants to rest. It is very useful for you to know who visits the baby-sitter in your absence, how often rings the telephone and so on. You even can return home earlier in order to check your baby-sitter.
Of course, there are much more questions every mom can ask, bur I hope that these once will be able to help every mother to find good and responsible person.

I think that this question disturbs every man and every woman throughout the world regardless their religion and age. However, in reality what does it mean to be mother and to be father?
All people suppose that the destination of every woman in the Earth is to continue human race. But our forefathers thought that if a woman had not children she could not be valuable. They made believe that only after a woman understood what it meant she would be able to feel her feminity completely. The birth of child is a miracle, which approaches every woman to the God. Everybody knows that practically all religions have a cult of mother.
A lot of women explain that they are not ready to be a mother. Furthermore, they frequently approach to this important event very irresponsibly. It is not a secret that the majority of them even do not plan the birth of their children. They become mothers in consequence of silly fortuitousness. A lot of women do not want to have children because these living beings limit their liberty. Moreover, children need many financial charges and very often they spoil a figure.
Nevertheless, if a woman decides to become a mum, it is necessary for her to raise the next question: Why I need this baby? It is not a secret that the most commonly used answer is I need someone in my old age, who will be able to offer a glass of water. It turns out that parents take care of their children only because they need someone, who will be able to look after them in declining years. And if a baby does not justify their hopes in future, he will receive reproaches about his ingratitude. However, it is necessary to remember that a child is not a bank to which people deposit their money with hope to receive interests in future. He must be desired. It is essential to take care and love him without selfish ends.
Every woman must evaluate her readiness to become a mother and it is necessary for her to think about what she will be able to give her baby. And the most important thing here is spiritual values. An educational program, elaborated for the majority of schools and universities, has not a goal to educate women in the sphere of motherhood. That is why if a woman decides to chose this way, she will have to study a lot in order to behave in a proper way during her pregnancy, childbirth and in post-natal period. It is really very important because the future of every child depends on it.
And now I would like to speak about men and their attitude to fatherhood. It is not a secret that for the majority of men fatherhood is not the most important and significant affair in the life. The first positions occupy their career and job. And it is useless to blame our dear mankind in selfishness and loss of consciousness. Simple the nature decided that in all periods of time men were getters and bread-winners, while women were the keepers of house fireside. Although, in spite of continuous pressure of work, they have to participate in the upbringing of their children. Every child needs not only maternal, but and paternal love and kindness. He carefully keeps an eye on the behavior of his parents and tries to imitate it.  And then in the future he will try to build his family according to the model in which he lived and grew up. That is why it is very important for every child to see under his very nose deserving example of both parents.
The desire to become father is frequently unconscious, at the level of instinct. All men simple want to continua their family and they do everything no to let it disappear.
The same way as women, all men should think carefully about their preparedness for this serious step.  They should begin to think about what they will be able to give their children. It is essential to weigh all merits and demerits. Psychologists believe that if woman feel motherhood in the first period of pregnancy, man begins to feel his fatherhood not also after baby birth. That is why in order to speed up his knowing of responsibility, man should prepare to the birth of his child together with his wife. Moreover, he should help her during the pregnancy, childbirth and in post-natal period.
So as we can see in our society both of parents should be responsible for the birth of healthy and valuable baby. The way to motherhood is very important in the life of every woman. And man has not to keep his distance. During the pregnancy he should take care about future mother and future baby by her deliverance from housekeeping. It is important to create in the house friendly and positive atmosphere. Sometimes a woman, who waits a child, has different whims in food and desires. In accordance with Kazakh folk custom, all wishes and desires of future mother are holy and father makes unbelievable efforts to satisfy them. Besides, fathers must remember an advice of ancient Greeks: a woman, who waits a child, should look at beautiful statues, pictures and listen to pleasant music. Accomplishment of all these conditions will help an expectant mother to give birth to healthy and cheerful baby!!!