“Expectant man”
Every woman does not be pregnant alone if she lives with intimate person. Usually both partners are pregnant. But what does it mean? It is not a secret, that people who live together have the same thoughts and opinions; they bear resemblance to each other. Even have the same symptoms of sickness. Men take hard pregnancy practically as women. There is a good people’s saying: “We are pregnant” or “We wait a child”
The situation of pregnancy for a man, who lives near, is more extreme than for a woman. She simply meets her engagements. Every woman knows that it is her mission to become a mom. And motherhood is the main purpose in the life. The same situation we can see in the nature. Males are a match for females, chase about them very carefully. Females choose prepotent and the most healthy male with thinks to have the most healthy and valuable descendants. Then, when the female has chosen, everybody wants to reproduce. Decree of nature! And after the female has become pregnant, she does not allow coming near the male. She has reached her goal. The next period is child-bearing. In the nature the male is only means, and the goal is posterity.
In the life people have another variety of means and goals, which are more global than animals have. But motherhood still remains unconscious instinct of every woman. That is why in spite of hard child-bearing and delivery, women want to have their own children. But about what does think every man, when he has heard this news? News about approaching fatherhood for man, especially young, ambition and energetic, firstly cause a real shock. He does not fell happy. He does not think about his contribution to the history. He does not think that someone will have his surname and will continue his family. I’m sorry, but the majority of the men think that they lost their sweet liberty and unconcerned adolescence. But not all of course! Some think like this: “How did it happen? I’m not ready…”
As for women, all their thoughts direct to upcoming baby. People say that expectant mother is more laid-back. She has unusual enigmatic look, softness and defenselessness. The man feels alarm, panic and fear of the unknown. His happiness comes much later. Men become responsible for the child. They have to protect their woman from the difficulties of the rest of the world. Pregnancy causes radical changes in the life of the both, in their relations, attitude to the life. It is a real strength test. It is a limitation of needs, responsibility for future, rebuilding of the plans and reconsideration of life values. It is a critical situation, only without critical days.
The conduct of future father depends on a lot of factors. Firstly, on his internal and individual features, upbringing, relations with his parents, attitude to the wife, maturity as an individual, readiness to realize emergent difficulties and new responsibility and desire to show his worth in a new role: defender, supporter, bread-winner and educator. It is very difficult for a man to be in the mood for experiences of his wife. From very beginning a woman contacts with her future baby. Pregnancy gives a wonderful chance to receive a lot of new feelings. It gives a feel of unity, divine pacification. Some men are delighted with woman’s capacity for giving a birth to a new person. The others perceive it easy, as physiological peculiarity. This feature from one side causes a feeling of women’s power and from another a feeling of men’s imperfection. This state of affairs provokes a man to compensate such situation. And as a result they work a lot, find a new woman or spend all their free time with friends.
In the beginning a man faces only with losses (from his point of view!) – less care of his wife, loss of his liberty, social and everyday problems, uncertainty and alarm for his future life. Sometimes a man feels that the baby takes his place, that the woman becomes all-sufficient and does not need him. Fear to become useless is the most serious emotional experience of every man.
Expectant woman can evoke in the man an image of his mother. And his reaction to the pregnancy will depend on a lot of his relations with the mom. Men like a big children!
Pregnancy is a real chance to strengthen a family. Both partners can not be free, because their future baby binds them as invisible thread. Sometimes men try to come back to their past life, time when they were really free. And as a result they can have affair with another woman. It looks like as psychological relaxation from new problems and future concerns. Some men are bored with their expectant wives, because women speak only about the baby and problems with their health. They are not so interesting interlocutors as it was before. And as a result men find passions and hobbies.
It is very difficult for man to understand what happens in the organism of his expectant wife. He can not have the same feelings according to his biological nature. But nowadays the scientists states that there are expectant man. Some men try to be imbued with pregnancy of their wives. The level of hormones in blood of this men increases. But this does not damage them. On the contrary, these men become the most careful and attentive fathers. After the delivery the level of hormones in blood rehabilitates itself. Such men for nine months are psychologically ready to the birth of the baby. And the baby before the birth has a positive image of his father. This active conduct of the man brings together both partners and influences positive to the process of pregnancy, emotional state of the woman and valuable intellectual development of the baby in future.